A growing number of mothers are exploring artificial intelligence (AI) as a novel solution to the pervasive challenge of managing household and parenting responsibilities. This emerging trend, highlighted by a recent feature in Wired, sees 'momfluencers' advocating for AI chatbots as a new form of co-parent, even suggesting they can be more effective partners than men in managing the 'mental load' associated with family life.
The discussion around this trend often references existing data on domestic labour. A 2023 report from the Pew Research Center indicated that, even in couples where both partners earn similar salaries, women in heterosexual marriages typically spend more than double the time on housework compared to their husbands. Furthermore, women reportedly dedicate almost two additional hours per week to caregiving, while men engage in an average of three-and-a-half more hours of leisure activities. This disparity in unpaid labour has long been a point of contention and a significant factor contributing to the 'mental load' often experienced by women.
One prominent figure in this movement is Lilian Schmidt, a Swiss mother who gained significant attention for claiming she had outsourced 97% of her mental load to ChatGPT. Schmidt, who has a three-year-old daughter, has capitalised on her viral story by offering a bespoke AI tool named 'Coparent' to her followers. Despite having a partner whom she states 'does his fair share', Schmidt has articulated that the majority of household planning still falls to her, attributing this to differing cognitive approaches: 'Our brains work differently. He’s a doer and takes on the planning. I do the thinking. That mental load falls on me.'
Schmidt's perspective, as shared with Wired, underscores a common sentiment: 'Unfortunately, mental load is still considered a female problem. A lot of men don’t even know what mental load even is.' This sentiment resonates with a burgeoning online market where various momfluencers are now selling handbooks, online courses, and YouTube guides on 'AI-ifying parenting'. This movement is also being described as the 'girlbossification of AI', with high-profile women like Reese Witherspoon and Sheryl Sandberg reportedly encouraging women to leverage chatbots to enhance their productivity in both parental and professional roles.
While the concept of AI as a co-parent might seem futuristic, it reflects a tangible desire among some women to find practical solutions for the ongoing imbalance in domestic labour and the associated cognitive burden. The availability of these AI tools and guides suggests a growing commercial interest in addressing these long-standing societal issues through technological innovation. However, it also prompts questions about the broader implications for human relationships and the division of labour within households.