Marilyn Hawes's life was turned upside down in 1981 when she met Jeff Carney at Wokingham church. Unbeknownst to her, this chance encounter would lead to years of manipulation and abuse by a man who presented himself as 'the Pied Piper' - magnetically appealing to children. Carney would go on to become a trusted figure, babysitting for Hawes's family, including her twin sons.
It wasn't until September 2002, after police investigated reports of similar incidents, that the horrifying truth emerged: Hawes's sons were suspected victims of Carney's abuse. Initially in denial, Hawes recounted her shock when police explained the concept of grooming - a term she had never heard before. Her children eventually disclosed their experiences under the guidance of the police.
Carney was arrested and pleaded guilty to sexual offences against children, receiving a 15-month prison sentence. After his release, he was convicted again for further offences and jailed. Hawes's mental health took a hit, leading her to leave her teaching position. In an effort to comprehend how she had been deceived, she delved into extensive research on grooming behaviour. She discovered how Carney deliberately cultivated an image of adoration and trust within the church community.
This personal tragedy propelled Hawes into action. In 2004, she established Enough Abuse - now known as Freedom from Abuse - to prevent child sexual abuse. Through this organisation, Hawes works with schools to educate teachers, parents, and children about paedophiles' tactics and the signs of grooming. She provides vital resources and coaching, advocating for a more direct approach to abuse prevention.
Hawes is an outspoken critic of the current PSHE curriculum in UK schools, deeming it 'too vague and soft-touch'. She believes many teachers lack a thorough understanding of how paedophiles groom their victims and that the curriculum neglects to discuss the emotional impact of abuse on children - a crucial aspect she insists is necessary for empowering them to speak out.