A debilitating form of obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD), known as Relationship OCD (ROCD), is increasingly being recognised, though a lack of specific data means its true prevalence in the UK remains largely unknown. Sufferers describe the condition as 'mental torture', causing profound distress and leading to compulsive behaviours aimed at finding reassurance about their romantic relationships.
ROCD extends far beyond typical relationship anxieties, involving persistent, intrusive doubts that can consume hours of mental energy daily. Sophia, a 24-year-old from Leeds, experienced severe symptoms, including an inability to leave her home due to fears of infidelity and constantly seeking reassurance through AI chatbots. Professor David Veale, a consultant psychiatrist at the South London and Maudsley NHS Trust, explained that while ordinary relationship thoughts do not dominate one's day, ROCD thoughts are all-encompassing.
OCD affects approximately 1.2% of the UK population, but ROCD is not recorded as a distinct condition, making it challenging to ascertain how many individuals are impacted. Professor Guy Doron, a clinical psychologist from Reichman University in Israel, noted that when he began researching ROCD over a decade ago, information was scarce, but he is now observing an increase in referrals. This rise in people seeking help is attributed to increased awareness, particularly through social media and research efforts.
ROCD typically manifests in two main categories: relationship-centred, focusing on doubts about one's own feelings, and partner-focused, centring on perceived flaws in a partner. While primarily affecting romantic partnerships, symptoms can also impact other relationship types. Triggers often include significant life transitions such as making a relationship official, cohabiting, or marriage. Sophia, for instance, found her OCD 'latched' onto her relationship when it became more serious, causing her to question even minor details about her boyfriend.
Experts suggest that while ROCD can affect anyone, individuals prone to perfectionism, overthinking, or with specific relationship experiences during their upbringing may be more vulnerable. The pervasive influence of social media also plays a role, as its often-romanticised depictions of love can create unrealistic expectations and intensify doubts for those with ROCD. This sentiment is echoed by sufferers who find the portrayal of 'perfect-looking couples' online to be particularly challenging.